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LA Declares Itself a Full-Blown Fortress City in Hilarious Attempt to Weather Trump’s Incoming...

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In a move that has left political analysts scratching their heads and late-night comedians gaining invaluable material, Los Angeles has enacted a new ordinance...

Local Man Shocked to Discover ‘Being Tired’ Is Just a Rational Response to Existing...

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In a stunning revelation, a local man has uncovered the shocking truth behind 'being tired'—a completely normal reaction to living in a world governed...

Local Man Convicted for Bewilderingly Overzealous Double Homicide, Claims it was Just a Misunderstanding...

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In a case that has bewildered everyone from the courtroom to social media, Richard Allen stands convicted of the tragic murders of two girls...

Luigi Mangione Hires 5-Star Attorneys to Defend Against Murder Charge, Promises to Set New...

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In a bizarre twist worthy of a courtroom drama, alleged murderer Luigi Mangione has gone above and beyond by securing a legal team so...

Multiple Drones Invade New Jersey Naval Station in Elaborate Scheme to Declare Independence for...

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In a jaw-dropping twist of events, a flotilla of rebellious drones has descended upon a New Jersey naval station, asserting their right to freedom...

Desperate Measures: Trump’s Border Czar Announces Nationwide Workplace Raids with Clown Car Logistics

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In a shocking escalation of workplace immigration policy, Trump’s newly appointed ‘border czar’ has unveiled plans for ludicrously extravagant immigration raids that will sweep...

Local Man Goes Extra Mile, Accidentally Discovers New Dimension of Existence and Becomes Intergalactic...

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In today's world where everyone feels the pressure to exceed expectations, one man's quest to go the 'extra mile' has literally warped the fabric...

Local Driver Turns Sports Center into Real-Life Demolition Derby, 35 Crushed Underweight of Spectacle

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In an unexpected fusion of athleticism and vehicular mayhem, a driver transformed a tranquil sports center into a scene more reminiscent of a disaster...

OpenAI Researcher and Whistleblower Suddenly Engaged in Intense Game of Hide and Seek with...

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The tragic story of a former OpenAI researcher, who met an untimely end at just 26, has taken a bizarre turn as authorities report...

Jersey Mike’s Subs Valued at $8 Billion After Mysterious Investment from Intergalactic Sandwich Consortium

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In a shockwave reverberating through both the culinary and financial worlds, Jersey Mike's Subs has reportedly rocketed to an astronomical $8 billion valuation following...