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Local Man Confirms Universe’s Total Lack of Sense Makes Absolutely No Sense to Him

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In a groundbreaking moment of existential clarity, one bewildered local has voiced an opinion about the universe that has left everyone scratching their heads....

Squirrel Launches Full-Scale Assault on Mom’s Window in Buffalo, City Declares State of Emergency

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In an unprecedented incident that has left Buffalo residents baffled and on high alert, a rogue squirrel took aim at a mother's window, igniting...

McKinsey & Company Settles Opioid Crisis Probe by Paying $650 Million in Monopoly Money

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In a move more reminiscent of a children’s game than corporate accountability, McKinsey & Company has agreed to pay $650 million to resolve a...

TIL Al Capone Ran Charity Dedicated to Feeding Three Hot Meals a Day to...

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In one of the most ludicrous twists of charity lore, infamous gangster Al Capone not only served up hot meals to the down-and-out during...

Wisconsin Woman Announces Divorce After Kayaker’s Elaborate Fake Death Turns Out to Be Ultimate...

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When a Wisconsin kayaker staged an elaborate hoax of his own demise, he likely had no idea that he would be paddling right into...

Biden Unleashes Presidential Fury, Neatly Commuting 1,500 Sentences While Hosting Nationwide Game of Clemency...

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In a spectacular showcase of executive power, President Biden shocked the world by commuting a jaw-dropping 1,500 sentences and doling out 39 pardons in...

Inside Norway’s Maximum Security Prisons: A 5-Star Resort for Criminals or Just Really Nice...

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Norway’s maximum security prisons have become the material of a bizarre vacation brochure. With facilities resembling luxurious hotels and activities including yoga classes and...

Canadian Teen Contracts Rare Super Bird Flu After Whispering Sweet Nothings to a Wild...

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In what can only be described as a plot twist straight out of a bizarre coming-of-age movie, a Canadian teenager finds themselves in a...

Donald Trump Jr. Spanks Zelenskyy for Allowance Cuts, Proposes ‘Budgeting for War’ Lecture

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In a bizarre twist of geopolitical ridicule, Donald Trump Jr. took to social media to mock Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy, suggesting a cut in...

Nation Holds Breath as Reddit Attempts Elaborate Ritual to Restore Productive Dialogue

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As Reddit dives headfirst into an elaborate scheme to reignite productive conversation, its users grab their popcorn in anticipation. This satirical exploration dissects Reddit's...