Shell Declares Emissions Reduction Optional, Promises To Make Up For It By Planting Trees...
In a shocking twist, Shell triumphs in court over an emissions reduction order, unveiling their bold new strategy: profound environmentalism through non-existent trees and...
U.S. Defense Contractor Offers $42 Million to Former Iraqi Detainees as Apology for Mental...
In a wild twist in corporate accountability, a U.S. defense contractor has announced it will pay $42 million to former Iraqi detainees, coupled with...
Archaeologists Discover Ancient Egyptian Party Scene Featuring Mummies Downing Psychedelic Cocktails at Raves
Recent archaeological discoveries have blown the lid off ancient Egyptian culture, revealing that the pharaohs were not just known for their hieroglyphs and tombs...
Local Historians Confirm: ‘Unluckiest Man in Pompeii’ Wins Lifetime Achievement Award for Suffering
Meet the 'unluckiest man in Pompeii,' whose skeleton tells a tragicomic tale of monumental bad luck, involving a rock, a tunnel, and a surprise...
Woman Forced to Await Miscarriage Care Amid Georgia’s Barbaric Abortion Law Now Just Waiting...
In a LAND OF THE BIZARRE, a woman finds herself caught in the whirlwind of Georgia's stringent abortion laws, making intuitive leaps into the...
Nation Offers Free Permanent Residency In Exchange For Bizarre Talent Show Audition
Imagine a world where the path to instant citizenship isn’t just paved with paperwork, but instead involves performing the moonwalk while reclining in a...
Local Man Convicted for Bewilderingly Overzealous Double Homicide, Claims it was Just a Misunderstanding...
In a case that has bewildered everyone from the courtroom to social media, Richard Allen stands convicted of the tragic murders of two girls...
Aspiring Criminal Can’t Contain Himself, Immediately Launches Epic 12-Part Crime Series Featuring Elaborate Heists...
In a shocking turn of events, a local man has decided that waiting to commit crimes is for chumps. He boldly declared his intention...
Mattel Unveils Latest Movie Dolls Featuring Accidentally Printed URL for World’s Leading Adult Entertainment...
In a stunning blunder that has left parents both puzzled and horrified, Mattel’s latest batch of ‘Wicked’ movie dolls has been accidentally packaged with...
TIL Al Capone Ran Charity Dedicated to Feeding Three Hot Meals a Day to...
In one of the most ludicrous twists of charity lore, infamous gangster Al Capone not only served up hot meals to the down-and-out during...
